I am writing to you in order to make someone understand that its good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.
“I am 32 years old. I and my ex hubby dated for six years, I started dating him whilst I was in form 4.I was 19 years old. We where best of friends. I waited until he completed college and started working.My family and his then met, we got married and had a son. (9 years old now).
My husband was short tempered at times, but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he can’t control me.
Every time we argue, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain. My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him. If he is controlling
me I would always dare him that if you wish divorce me but in the real sense, I never wanted divorce, I just had pride and I never wanted to look a lose in his eyes. One day I pushed him so had that for the first time he beat me and lock me out side, I went to my family and my family took him to the police. Every time I looked like I am being abused! But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.
He was arrested and detained. I was asked by his family to withdraw the case, I felt that what I was doing was wrong.
My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall,of which he openly knelt down and apologised. I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled. After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue, and he remained alone.
After two days I received a call that he is in hospital, my family told me that I shouldn’t go there because it will look like am begging him, and my sisters believed he was faking the illness. All this time, people felt
sorry for me like I was the one being abused.
He spent a week in hospital, after he was discharged from hospital, I just received a divorce summon. I wanted to say no to divorce, but because I felt this pride, I wanted him to change his mind and beg me. I called him to inform him that if it was the divorce he wanted, he will get it because I felt I was living like was in hell.
When we went to court, I wanted to make him pay, so I told the court that I needed his properties to be shared. To my suprise he openly told the court that whatever we had acquired together should be given to me, all he wanted was divorce.
We where divorced in 2009 July.
Now, this Sunday my husband is marrying, whilst I am here wasted! My family are gossiping about me, I depend on what my ex gave to my son for survival. I know I wasted my
marriage. I am here telling all wives that they should be carefull how they get advise.
Don’t be cheated, be careful. Even my young sisters are much more respected than me. Those who encouraged me to divorce are always bad mouthing me. Please ladies listen and take this seriously”.
NB: There is no benefit in pride